Spring Cleaning for Emotional Eating

 
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During this time of the year, you might spend some extra time cleaning out your home. Clearing out the cobwebs and dust bunnies that have collected in the corners over the winter, changing out clothing for the new season and getting rid of old stuff that might be cluttering your space and fogging your mind. This process requires a lot of effort and when it is completed it feels so refreshing. After a good spring cleaning you feel lighter, calmer, and accomplished don’t you? I know I love a clean and clutter free space, I just don’t always love doing the work it takes to get there!

While you might spend this time cleaning your physical space, do you ever think about spring cleaning your pantry, fridge, habits and emotions? Spring is a time of renewal and hope. With more light, energy, nature and bright colors all around, spring provides inspiration. If you have become bogged down by emotional and stress eating and these habits feel frustrating, NOW is the time to clear it all out.

When you consider spring cleaning for emotional eating, it’s helpful to work in the direction that makes the most sense for you. You might begin from clearing your pantry + fridge to then clearing your habits and emotions. However, you might feel more comfortable working from the other way around, where you clear out emotions + habits and then shift to kitchen. No matter which direction suits you the best, the outcome will definitely be the same. Through this process of spring cleaning for emotional eating, you can refresh and renew your relationship with food—and with yourself.

Spring Cleaning the Pantry + Fridge

While it might make more sense for you to work from the other direction, l will start with clearing out the pantry and fridge first. When you spring clean there is a process of letting go of things that no longer serve you, releasing built up grime, dust and dirt and a creation of positive feelings with the action you are taking. The same is true as you clean and clear your pantry and fridge.

When starting, you want to align with your goal and then determine if the items in your fridge and pantry serve you and your goals. What do you want? How do you want to feel? Do the foods currently in your fridge and pantry provide that outcome? If yes, take inventory and plan when you will use them. Get creative, cook new dishes, refresh old ones, have fun with it. If no, these items don’t align with your goals and how you want to feel, you can choose to donate them or give them to a neighbor or friend. It’s a helpful process that will leave you feeling empowered and motivated to care for yourself. After the clearing process, be sure to organize and clean them out so it feels calming to open and access your fridge and pantry.

During this clearing process, notice what foods might be “trigger” foods. Trigger foods are ones that it’s difficult to stop eating once you start or ones that you crave to temporarily suppress stress and uncomfortable emotions. These foods are not bad foods or good foods, they just may not serve you and it’s helpful to evaluate if having them in your space helps move you in the direction of your goals. If they don’t, you don’t have to keep them.

Spring Cleaning Habits + Emotions

Now let’s dive into spring cleaning for your habits and emotions. This process is a bit less straight forward. You can’t just give or throw away your habits and emotions so easily. You can start this process of spring cleaning emotional eating through self-reflection. Be honest with yourself about how often you are using food to suppress stress and emotions, how often you turn to food for comfort. Be curious about how that makes you feel about yourself. Become aware of how any habits and patterns of stress and emotional eating have created a rift in your relationship with yourself and your body.

Once you can deeply reflect and develop self-awareness, you can begin to clear out the habits and develop healthier ways to cope with your stress and emotions. To change a habit you need to replace it with a new, healthier, more desired habit. If you have been feeling stressed during the quarantine or if you struggled with any winter blues, you might have developed a habit of soothing with food in the evenings, when feeling down, lonely or bored, among other emotions. For example, maybe you started eating something after dinner that comforts you and releases your stress regardless of whether or not you were still hungry. There may be some pondering about wanting to stop this habit or maybe even some guilt for having it, however, it feels too difficult to break.

You want to consider spring cleaning this habit first by determining what else could you do in the evenings to soothe your mind and body that do not include the comfort foods? How do you want to feel? Can you practice assessing your hunger levels and committing to only eating if you truly feel hungry? Can you journal to connect with why this habit feels so good and so bad at the same time? You want to dive into self-awareness and self-reflection and create a plan to shift this habit into something more desirable and something that can still soothe you without food.

Changing a habit takes time and constant self-reflection and self-awareness. I recently wrote 10 blogs about creating a life that you love, you can review the overview here. You can go back and check out each of the steps in depth on the blog for support with this challenging change process. While awareness is the first step, you have to create action steps and a formulate a plan to actually follow through.

When you are spring cleaning any habits that no longer serve you, awareness that the habit has become problematic is the first step and then deciding what you could do and aligning with a sense of what you truly want is the next. Then you, of course, need to have a plan for how you are going to make it happen. Following through, consistency and believing in yourself are super important when it comes to creating the change you desire.

Commit to yourself to spring clean just one habit. Be sure to give yourself time to reflect in order to ensure that you make it happen.

As you begin to shift your habit, you may notice more emotions and stress to become present when you are no longer soothing them with food. This is where journaling is a great place to start when working to spring clean your emotions. Giving yourself time and space to recognize, sit with, understand, process and release your emotions is essential. Journaling offers you a specific safe place to do this.

Anytime you experience a food craving is a great time to pull out your journal and get in touch with the craving. This way you can determine if it’s an emotional craving or more general craving. Go through the Pause, Reflect, Release process where you first pause and give yourself space away from the craving. Then reflect where you can explore and understand the craving and then attempt to release the craving. If is an emotional craving, you will choose a coping tool to help manage or release the emotion. If it is a general craving, you might choose to eat the food, however you want to be sure do so mindfully. Allow yourself to savor and enjoy your food.

Breath work, movement, and talking are additional helpful tools to cleanse and clear in mind and body. No matter what you do to begin to spring clean your stress and emotional eating patterns, start somewhere and believe in yourself and your ability to create the change you desire.

Am I An Emotional Eater?

 
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During these times of living in quarantine, the isolation and worry has anxiety and stress at an all-time high. Many who may not typically suffer with disordered eating patterns are finding that they are turning to food (amongst other things) to release their stress and numb out the variety of uncomfortable feelings they are encountering daily. This can create a negative and damaging pattern of emotional and stress eating as a coping skill for anxiety, stress, and any uncomfortable emotions. If the pattern is left unattended it can turn into more serious disordered eating patterns and significant struggles related to health and wellbeing in mind and body.

If you are unsure if you are an emotional eater, you can take the following quiz to assess how far you may have slipped into a pattern of stress and emotional eating. 

Am I an Emotional Eater?

1.    Do you find that you feel overly full or “stuffed” after meals?

2.    Do you find yourself snacking throughout the day even if you are not feeling hungry?

3.    Do you find yourself thinking about food many times throughout the day?

4.    Do you eat/snack at night after dinner?

5.    Do you hide your food from others?

6.    Do you struggle with unwanted weight gain/weight fluctuations? 

7.    Have you tried multiple diets, supplements, workout routines with some success of weight loss only to regain the majority of the weight?

8.    Do you feel as though you live your life in a state of rushing and trying to stay busy most of the time?

9.    Do you feel as though your body and your health are suffering due to your eating and stress? 

10. Do you have an outlet or way of coping with your stress and emotions that you use consistently, such as journaling, attending therapy, a creative outlet, a hobby, a meditation or mindfulness practice, moving your body regularly, someone to talk to that you trust…?

11. Do you practice self-care regularly? This means engaging regularly in intentional relaxation and things that you find enjoyable for example: mindfulness, yoga, exercise, massage, walking, deep breathing, social time with friends regularly, taking self-enrichment classes, spiritual connection, reading for fun, create art/music, listen to music, spending time in nature…?

Scoring:

  • Give yourself 1 point each for a “Yes” on Questions 1-9

  • Give yourself 1 point each for a “No” on Questions 10 & 11

  • If your score is a 9 or higher you are most likely an emotional eater and it may be indicative of deeper concerns in relation to your relationship with food.

  • If your score is a 4-8 you most likely turn to food for comfort and release of emotional and physical stress and are at risk of it becoming more disordered.

  • If your score is 2-3 you may turn to food at times, but you most likely have some other outlets for your emotions as well and now is a good time to make choices about how to cope more effectively with the current stressors you are experiencing.

  • If your score is a 0 or 1 you most likely are not an emotional/stress eater.

If you are feeling overwhelmed by your response, it’s ok, awareness is always the first step to creating meaningful change in your life. Often when you have been struggling with emotional or stress eating for some time, you don’t recognize the level of stress you experience. This is because you’ve been using food to not have to experience the depths of your emotions and stress, however if you are now becoming more aware, you may recognize the patterns more extensively.

When you have been numbing out the stress and uncomfortable emotions, it’s a process to begin to separate out your food choices from your emotions and there is a lot you can do to begin to empower yourself to break free from emotional and stress eating patterns.

If you are ready for another approach and have no idea of where to begin, you might begin by reading this blog: I Just Discovered I’m Emotional Eater, Now What? Once you are aware of the pattern you can start by tapping into your self-care and coping skills. Begin to discover what nourishes you that is not food. Connect with the inner workings of your emotional world and shift your relationship to them. Begin to manage your stress slowly and effectively.

Know that there is hope for healing and awareness is always the first step. If you need some support through the change process, I have written many blogs on the topic. This one is an overview of the 10-Steps to Create a Life You Love that may be a helpful place to begin (all 10 are written about in-depth if this one piques your interest!) I encourage you to read what resonates with you and begin to implement any suggestions that feel right for you.

I offer other resources on my resources page related to mindfulness and nutrition, you can check those out here and here. You can check out my book as a self-help guide, Wholistic Food Therapy: A Mindful Approach to Making Peace with Food, if you are interested, you can find it HERE.  I also offer individual coaching packages to those who prefer a one-on-one approach.

Another resource is my signature online program, Freedom From Emotional Eating. It is a 10-module online course designed to help you break free from emotional and stress eating patterns by addressing the struggle from the deepest roots. This is an in-depth, self-paced and mindfulness centered approach to make peace with food. It is currently significantly discounted to help those who may need extra support during these quarantined, isolating times. Now is the time to heal, to move forward and create the relationship with food and with yourself that you desire.

No matter what resources you access, I hope that you find the support you need during these challenging times. Opening yourself to change, growth and healing is life changing and empowering. That is what we all need during these challenging times. I hope this finds you safe and healthy. Be well!

Step ONE to Creating a Life You Love: Self-Awareness

 
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“Self awareness is the honest ability to take a look at your life without any attachment to it being right or wrong, good or bad.” –Debbie Ford

Last week I introduced ten steps to creating a life that you love and over the next ten posts I’ll be diving deeper into each step. When I think about any of the changes I have made in life, usually the first time I attempted the change it didn’t stick. Things like exercising consistently, eating well, self-care, meditation, reducing stress and anxiety, all did not integrate so easily. When I was able to examine why I couldn’t seem to be consistent, I realized a lot about myself and how I operate. I need structure, support, accountability—and I have to need and want the change for a reason bigger than “I should” do this. It was through the process of self-reflection and self-awareness I could see where I was getting in my own way of making the changes I claimed I wanted in my life. That leads me to step one, which is self-awareness. This step encourages a process and specific practices to become deeply self-aware.

In order to know yourself fully and understand your patterns—whether they are positive (encourage change and consistency) or negative (self-sabotage and fear based)—and get comfortable with the discomfort of change, you MUST have self-awareness. This first step to creating a life that you love offers you the ultimate foundation for change. The process of becoming more self-aware allows you to explore and examine your internal emotional world, how you respond to life, what motivates and inspires you as well as the often self-created blocks to change that are standing in your way.

Mindfulness is a major part of this step, as is self-compassion. Having a deeper understanding why you have not yet made the changes you set out to make more than once is key to knowing yourself and building your Inner Strength to make it happen. When you are living mindfully you create opportunities to know yourself and accept yourself completely with a nonjudgmental awareness. When you can remove the judgment you remove pain and shame. This step presents opportunities to create practices to live a truly mindful life. As you become more self-aware, present and accepting, you will begin to tune into and listen to your inner wisdom.

Understanding how to be mindful and practicing mindfulness have been big time game changers in my life. I have learned that I am indeed my own worst enemy—or my greatest ally. If you have had a desire to make a specific change in your life, possibly in relation to your relationship with food, understanding yourself and why you have not stepped into a space of change will create the opportunity to open yourself up to the possibilities on the other side of your limiting beliefs and fears.

When it comes to emotional and stress eating, the difficult part about change can be not understanding how it became a negative pattern, and then not knowing what else to do with stress and uncomfortable emotions besides soothe them with food (or fill in food with whatever your self sabotage patterns may be). That is why self-awareness is where we start. When you become self-aware, you understand and see clearly where your patterns have arisen from so that you can begin to create change through self-awareness, self-reflection and self-compassion.

While self-awareness is understanding that the patterns exist, self-reflection allows you to understand how these unhealthy patterns originated and become “stuck” and then self-compassion creates internal peace and acceptance. All of these elements require that you are mindful, that you are fully present and that you engage with what is true right now without judging it. This vital piece of mindfulness—the nonjudgment—is the kicker! You might feel really adept at being present, however, your ego might have a WHOLE LOT to say about the present moment as it is being presented to you—this is right, this wrong, this your fault, this is their fault, you are superior, you are inferior—the poor ego is where we usually hold much of our internal messiness. Being nonjudgmental and compassionate recognizes that we all are a mess to some degree and that is not good or bad, it’s just what is true right now.

Below are some questions that allow you tap into what you want in a reflective way. These questions offer an opportunity to understand your limiting beliefs, your internal “mess” and begin to not only challenge them, but understand that they are a part of your past and you no longer need them as you move forward. Couple this self-reflection with self-awareness and a daily dose of mindfulness and you will be well immersed in step one!

Pull out your favorite journal or any pen and paper and as you read each question just begin to “free write” whatever comes to mind. Don’t overthink this and definitely do not judge what comes up and out. Just write…

1.    What do I think when I hear the word change?

2.    How does it feel in my body when I think about the word change?

3.    What do I want?

4.    What limiting beliefs do I have about what you want?

5.    Do I believe it is possible for me to have this, why or why not?

6.    Is any of what I want coming from a space of ego, meaning what others will think if I had this, or having this makes me a better or worse person in the eyes of others?

7.    Are there any internal judgments coming up inside of me because I want this?

8.    How much do I want this, how long have I wanted this, what have I done so far to get this?

9.    What is the reason I have not pursued what I want?

10. Where did this reason come from?

11. What motivates me when I do pursue what I want?

12. What is my biggest fear?

Now read back over your answers and notice how it feels to be in a space of self-reflection and self-awareness. I recommend that you follow up with some free writing from a space of self-compassion. The three steps to self-compassion are: 1. mindfulness, recognizing how you are feeling in this moment without judging it; 2. creating a sense of connection, recognizing that at times everyone feels this way; and 3. kindness, speaking to yourself as you would a friend about why you have not moved forward towards what you want as well as offering yourself kind reassurance. Write down your biggest insights that you have created through self-reflection.

I encourage you to practice a mindful minute every day for this next week (and beyond!) where you set a timer and begin to connect to the rhythm of your breath. Any time you notice that you are attending to a distraction, such as a thought, a sound, an emotion or a body sensation, release the distraction and return your focus to your breath. Your mind may get distracted every second, that’s ok! Just return your focus to your breath every second! Mindfulness is called a practice for a reason! Remember that in life you get good at what you practice…

So that’s first step towards creating a life that you love, self-awareness. When you know yourself and stop judging yourself—and you open yourself to understanding your own blocks and doing the work to move forward—you set yourself up to create a life that you love.

I will be back next week with step two, aligning with your sense of purpose. This step will be fun and engaging, however, it will be most helpful to move forward when you understand why you have been standing still, so do the work this week to reflect to prepare yourself to tap into your vision and purpose!